Where Is My Foot????!!!!

Yesterday was a pretty good day as far as getting a few things done.  I usually don’t get to do too much because of fatigue issues and stumbling around.  I was able to get the laundry taken care of and fixed a meatloaf, creamed potatoes, green peas and a fruit salad.  I was feeling rather proud of myself.

That feeling was not to last.  I sat at the computer (which is my normal place to be!) for a while in the late afternoon.  When I tried to stand up, my right foot was nowhere to be found.  It was like trying to walk on a sponge that just keep sinking down and did not reach a solid level.  I found it very scary, since there was no way to know when/if it would return and when the next episode would occur.

The MS Society website states: “Numbness of the face, body or extremities (arms and legs) is one of the most common symptoms of MS. Often it’s the first symptom experienced by those eventually diagnosed with MS. The numbness may be mild or so severe that it interferes with the ability to use the affected body part. For example, a person with very numb feet may have difficulty walking. Numb hands may prevent writing, dressing, or holding objects safely. There are no medications to relieve numbness. Fortunately, however, most instances of numbness are not disabling, and tend to remit on their own. In very severe cases, a neurologist may prescribe a brief course of corticosteroids, which often can temporarily restore sensation. ”

I always get such a laugh reading some of the MS “official” sites.  Take the above, for example.  When saying that most instances of numbness are not disabling, I guess it depends on your point of view.  I found that not being able to feel my foot was VERY disabling!  I guess it depends on if you are the one writing about it or the one experiencing it!

In an article by Julie Stachowiak, Ph.D on About.Com, she says: “I understand intellectually what the medical writers and physicians mean when they refer to MS-related numbness and tingling as “only an annoyance,” “not disabling,” or a “benign” symptom. However, it is language like this that informs me that the writer has probably never experienced this symptom. Holding nothing against these people who are trying to help us, I’ll say that for myself, the itching, burning and tingling was a minor form of physical and emotional torture. The time when I felt the most alienated from my neurologist was when he responded to my question concerning how long this would last and what could I do to make it stop with a smile and a shrug.” 

As I have said before, I do NOT wish this disease on anyone, I just wish the medication profession could realize that everyone does not fit into a box, our symptoms are not always the same and “take two aspirin and call me in the morning” does NOT help!

 

Oh foot, my foot

You, I cannot feel

I’ve prodded and poked

But you just don’t appear real.

You seem like a blob

That’s attached to my leg,

I feel like a Pirate

With a strange wooden peg.

When I try to stand

On this soft squishy thing

It makes me afraid

Of the fall it might bring.

So I sit here and wonder

If you will come back

Or you’ve left me alone

With a panic attack.

I hope you’ll return

I will welcome you with glee

And hope that you won’t ever again

Decide to flee from me.

I love you my foot

I miss you so much

But until you return

I guess my best friend is a crutch.

(NOT my foot, by the way!!)